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bfaithful
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Posted on 03-27-07 9:09
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So many young men and women seem to be perplexed while deciding to get married. ..what do u all think that a ideal gal or boy would be to get married specially in the US?
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gahugoro
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Posted on 03-28-07 11:45
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I agree with republican about the divorce rate in India. It's the same thing in Nepal as well. No matter what divorce is never an option for a couple. People chose rather to live a life in hell than giving a divorce, and then some argue that it's working fine based on the statistics of divorce. Especially, it's very hard for women living as a housewife. She can never think of divorce as she always tends to think divorce would lead to more suffering than the current level of pain. I always like to read and still not miss reading the section 'Sata ko Grihini' on 'Saptahiki'. What I personally think is that most don't speak the truth; it's obvious as it's almost impossible to reveal the truth in the public. But still I'm addicted reading that particular section. We give more importance to 'status', 'salary', and we forgot completely about the one from my 'caste'. May be 'status' means already those included in the category of my 'caste'. To those looking for 'status', will you marry a guy with very good status but very rude, selfish and uncaring husband and a successful career or the one with mediocre job but very nice, loyal, and caring guy? I deliberately didn't address 'love' because I take it more as a relative term as I don't know the definition of it.
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dyamn
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Posted on 03-28-07 11:58
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that does not necessarly mean it is bad; when you don't have option to fail, you pass. when you don't have option to drop out you graduate, when you don't have option to die you live.. when you don't have option to devorce you work it out...
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republican
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Posted on 03-28-07 11:59
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Lol! She's 5 '6. Quite tall but a baby compared to him. Xena, its not in the blood, its in the minds. And in my opinion its wrong. Specially because we tend to focus on hereditary status. Like people staking claim on their parents' wealth and achievements. Same when it comes to marriages when people look at the bride or groom's parents' wealth and status and how much thought really goes into the character and potential of the bride/groom itself? Recipe for disaster I say! The focus should be on the individual and not on the status of his/her family. Sure it plays a big part in our society, but my opinion is that it should play a very small part in the decision. To alter Martin Luther King's line a little bit "Don't judge a person by status, but by the content of his/her character"!
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gahugoro
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Posted on 03-28-07 12:06
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I didn't say it's good or bad. What I mean is that 2% divorce rate doesn't say anything. Making a conclusion based on that poor biased number is wrong. You're right. It works out when we don't have the options. But if given an environment for good society with unbiasness, wrong judgements, and opportunities of remarriage for both genders, independent wives, I'm sure that divorce rate would jump. It happens with either love or arranged marriage in our society. It may seems higher divorce rate in love marriage, but I think that it has more to do with woman having more education, jobs and financial independence rather than just because they had a love marriage. So I strongly disagree about the conclusion you made about love marriage though I'm heading towards arranged marriage myself.
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Xena
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Posted on 03-28-07 12:21
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Republican, waah! waah! U hit the jackpot with Luther's statement. I know its not in the blood, but that's the typical statement when one believes he/she can't change :D Blame it on the blood k. Yea, nepali ppl have this habit of looking at family ko wealth. As long as the guy is capable of earning good income, who cares what his family have. Baau ko saampati khayera some guys are so proud of themselves...seen alot of those...it's pretty disgusting. Anyway, love or arranged marriage ko tension na linu, manchey haru. Whatever god gives, take it :D
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dyamn
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Posted on 03-28-07 12:24
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and have you or any westerner done any research if the 98% of the people who've stayed in their marriages are unhappy and forcefully staying with their partners given the social pressure? isn't that a bias thing to do too, to assume that majority of 98% are forced to live together? Our culture teaches us to compromise and work out... that is something we should be proud of..
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bfaithful
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Posted on 03-28-07 12:37
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Oops I missed the main points, oh how about keta/ketiko mama ghar? and what do the rest of the family members do, where r u originally from and how tall u r again eventhough the person is sitting next to him/her? Are these good questions to ask when u r meeting first time somebody like "keta/keti herneko din ma ke". I am not sure how to write well... anyway so it is good to listen from all different people. I think sajha has really diverse type of people. It is good we try to express our views here.........
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npl2us
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Posted on 03-28-07 1:52
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don't look much. there is not such a thing called perfect match. life is about making the best out of whatever you've got.
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Contour
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Posted on 03-28-07 2:13
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uptowngal
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Posted on 03-28-07 2:24
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i m so agree with npl2us.
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pupiffy
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Posted on 03-28-07 4:20
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Intersting discussion. Carry on!!!
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Mr. Hyde
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Posted on 03-28-07 4:25
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First sleep together and find out how good she is in bed; I mean does she snore while fast asleep? If you were careless to not to find that out before marriage, you will have to put up with that snore until death do you both apart!
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Mr. Hyde
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Posted on 03-28-07 4:34
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Does anyone know what Xenaphobia is? I think I am suffering from it since I started noticing a partuclar sajha patron! ;p
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pupiffy
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Posted on 03-28-07 4:39
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Mr. Hyde drink red bull. That will help.
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Xena
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Posted on 03-28-07 10:22
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Mr. Hyde, phobia re? I am not armed..k ko daar maney ko? Give my regards to Dr. Jerkyll
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twistedcon
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Posted on 03-28-07 11:31
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inzamam
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Posted on 03-29-07 5:03
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Xena mulla how dare you call me a sicko......i can guarntee that you thought the same thing i did when you same the damn picture..........dont f***try to be so pavitra.......mulla
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gahugoro
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Posted on 03-29-07 7:53
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This is what I got on one nepali blog site. Family tens of a Nepali and an American Friend-Have a Fun March 28, 2007 Posted by Utshab in Fun & Entertainment. Here is an interesting riddle between a Nepali and an American Friend that I have got in my mail. I felt it interesting and put in this blog. So, you guys also may enjoy it. Have a Fun. Two men, one American and a Nepali were sitting in a bar drinking shot after shot. The Nepali man said to the American,” You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven’t even met once. We call this arranged marriage. I don’t want to marry a woman whom I don’t love…I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems. “The American said, “Talking about love marriages… I’ll tell you my story. I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years. “After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step-daughter and so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father’s father-in-law. My daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother. More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father’s brother and so he my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son. Now my father’s son i.e. my brother is my grandson. Ultimately, I have become my own grand father and I am my own grandson. And you say you have family problems…. Give me a break!!” http://utshab.wordpress.com/
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NaakPore
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Posted on 03-29-07 11:09
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Xena
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Posted on 03-29-07 11:16
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lol! that was a great one, Naak pore! hahaha!
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